Thursday, October 6, 2011

When acid was my religion...

WARNING: Post may contain content from my past that some of you may not know about...if you have any shred of a notion that I was a good and well-behaved youth, please...read NO FURTHER!!! hahahhahahaha!

One night about 11 years (oh my GOD!!  This makes me feel really OLD!!) ago I experienced a feeling that I have seldom (if ever) felt again.  We headed down to Irvine for a party at Boomers.  We stood in line, got in, and waited for our friends who held the goods.  When our friends finally showed up they were no longer allowing anyone into the party so we decided to follow the drugs back home to our drug den apartment, drop acid, and watch Fantasia instead.  It was the best decision we ever could have made.  For the first part of the movie we were laughing and giggling and talking and interacting with each other.  As we got deeper and deeper into the movie, however, we became quiet and completely engrossed in what was going on with the television screen.  Then came Night on Bald Mountain.  To this day I hold the intense feeling of this moment in my chest whenever I think about it.  The transition from Night on Bald Mountain (where you are faced with all that is evil and dark in the world) to Ave Maria (when the glow of dawn begins to brighten the sky and brings hope of a bright and beautiful new day) was, at that particular moment, one of the most awesome and prolific moments of my life.  I was so moved by this moment that I was paralyzed.  I remember not really being able to figure out exactly what it was my eyes were witnessing, but I just continued to sit there...staring in wonderment.  As the beam of light peers through and grows bigger and brighter I remember my chest and lungs filling with air so much so that I thought my chest would just burst open because of the sight of absolute beauty that unfolded before me.  After the movie ended, we all just sat there, stunned, unable to move, unable to speak, unable to make sense of what we had just experienced together.  We sat in silence for what seemed like ten minutes...just stunned and trying to process the beauty of life after such a thing.  I suppose, in time, we finally came to realize we were sitting in that gross little Anaheim apartment (with the cigarette ashes, the cat shit, and the dirt and grime that generally comes with living with a four other people that are constantly on drugs (not to mention the parade of other random people that were coming and going out of that apartment at any given hour of any given day), or coming down from drugs, or making drugs, or selling drugs) and came down from the Fantasia high.  Eventually the silence was broken and we were able to reflect a little about the adventure and almost religious (I suppose?...being of no religion I guess I can't really say what that would look like...so we'll just say this is my own Acid Religion) experience.  I don't think any of us were very good at being able to express in words what had happened, but we "knew" what had happened there that moment in life and moved on.  Although Fantasia was over, we were far from coming down from the high from the 12+ hits of acid we had consumed...in fact we had a whole night of fun and general insanity in front of us...but that is a moment in life that I will never forget.  I was reminded of this moment as I was driving to work the other morning and listening to the "Halloween" playlist on my Ipod (which Night on Bald Mountain is a part of).   I was just sitting in the car, driving along when BAM! DRUGS!  Please enjoy the clip I have provided and share in this beautiful moment with me...won't you?


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